"There were no cops, no trees, no humans of any kind so we decided to wring out the little Ford. For 47 minutes straight the Fusion was pinned at 111 mph with the A/C on getting 25mpg. John, Gabe and I all sat there astonished. We made one fuel stop, saw no other Bullrunners and came in... are you ready... 6th place for the day! IN A RENTED FORD FUSION!! CAN I GET A BOOYA!!!
Ford people, if you are reading this contact me immediately because I don't think you know how good this little car is. Seriously, we should talk about perhaps producing some Ford Fusion "MR. ANGRY" editions. I LOVE THIS CAR!"
We're all car guys (and girls!) here, so I'm pretty sure that at one point or another we've run from a cop. lol... I think we should leave out the running from the cop stories unless you made the news. Then we demand YouTube clips! hahahaha
well in the summer me and my car club im in do some street racing out in the country late at night. we have like 50 cars park at this empty house with a field in the back. and people just take turns racing down the street in the front. there is a quarter mile marked and everything. last year i got to run agains a 5.0 mustang in my 71 trans am. just as we got done, and got to our turn around point cops were busting everyone in that field, but me and that 5.0 were already outta there. it was great.
and then of course on my new audition video everyone can see me hit a wall hard at our local oval race track in a 1986 trans am i bought for 500 bucks just to race out there. ill tell you that wall came at me quick and it hurt !
"speed, mods, cars in general.. is like crack. and then it becomes my crack is better than your crack. Why can;t we just enjoy the crack together? Just enjoy the crack man"
and then of course on my new audition video everyone can see me hit a wall hard at our local oval race track in a 1986 trans am i bought for 500 bucks just to race out there. ill tell you that wall came at me quick and it hurt !
Me and a buddy took two Yugo's to the track once. We sat there challenging everybody to a race for pink slips haha... I think that was pretty crazy. You shoulda seen the looks on people's faces.
Put the seat all the way back, and put the steering wheel level so she doesn't bruise her back. VERY IMPORTANT!! She has to be a little shorter than you so that you can see over her shoulder!!
Well since i drive a truck and have LOTS of room in the front seat ill let you all imagine what can be done while driving. And as far as cop problems i dont have them because most of the cops dont think of 8000lb diesel trucks as FAST little do them know. Oh and im also a firefighter.
i did end up on the news there was a accident on I-70 and a reporter on scene is reporting and you here about 6 cars racing down scarborough boulevard next to the highway brought the attention of the roporter off the 8 car pile up at brice rd and I-70 i was sixteen and got a phone call from mom watching the six o'clock news. the worst times are not paying the 100 dollar ticket but having your ass in a sling and your iroc sold based on the local news. hell i bought the car parents made me sell it and buy a 4door nova... and man do i miss that nova!!!! or the 400sb that fooled the crap out of mom
California 1977. I'm busting down I-5 just coming out of El Toro in my '76 Chevy Sport Bed step-side, lowered, 350/450 WHP, Cragars and Mickey's singing, doing about 80 MPH...taking it easy. Now, these are the hey-days of CB radios. My truck is LOADED with electronics...CB...kickers...filters...directionals, you name it, I have it.
When all of a sudden the radio comes to life. "Breaker 19, Breaker, looking for a Smokey report coming out of Fresno, 3 fast-movers need a recon'." "Hey Breaker, you got the Baby Blue Marine here (ya, I know)." I respond. "You're clear down to the San Juan exit. I haven't seen a thing." "Copy that 'Marine." he says. "Best move over." he finished. So, I keep on at my 80 MPH when what to my wondering eyes should appear...
...a dark spot against the shimmering tarmac behind me at about a half...no...quarter...no...HOLY SH_T! This was the first time I saw the LP400 Countach...for the nanosecond I did see it. Right behind it was, what I was to find out later...a Ferrari Dino 308 GT4. And pulling fast on the outside was, again, something I didn't know until later; a Ferrarri 512 BB. He had to be doing close to 160 MPH.
"Fast movers," I said. "You're coming past me!" "Thanks!" One of them yelled back on the CB and then they were GONE. Not gone, however, was the CHIPS that had been sitting on the overpass. He was coming like gangbusters down the entrance ramp!
"Break to fast movers!" I yelled. "Smokey on the ramp, coming hard!" "10-4 'Marine, not to worry...we're gone!" he said. And they were. And the Patrolman knew it. So, he went for the next best thing...the guy that had been running their 'front door' and who he'd been listening to. I'd slowed to 5 over...so as not to look too suspiscious. To no avail. He lit me up. I pulled over. He got out of his vehicle and walked up, looking all pissed off.
He chewed me out for '...aiding and abetting...' dangerous motorists, then strolled around my truck checking it out. He looked under the fenders into the wheel wells and asked me to pop the hood. "What's that?" he asked. "Blower." says I. I get back in my truck. He writes me a ticket for...dropping refuse on the highway. He said a McDonald's bag flew out of my bed. I turned around, he smirked...while I stared at my custom all-leather from Tijuana tonneau cover, tightly snapped down. Plus, real men don't eat at McD's...so, no chance.
I took the ticket. Then 50 miles down the road in a rest stop, flagging me down, were the three criminals. I stopped and we talked cars for a good hour and they got a good laugh out of my getting a ticket...then, pulled out their wallets and came up with the fine.
So, I'm in Dunnelon, FL, during my 'dark days' in 1980. Just got done DJing at the club in Crystal River...it was late, around 4 am 'cause we'd been hanging out in the parking lot, me, Jack the Bouncer and Karen, my g/f. I hop into my 1978 Monza (man I wish I still had THAT car) and take off. I'm dead tired...zipping through the back roads of Dunnelon county headed home...when I come upon Dead Man's Curve...doing about 80 MPH...and asleep.
The right front wheel dropped off the tarmac, jolting me awake. I'm pretty sure I screamed like a girl, wrestling the wheel and stomping the brake pedal clear through the fire wall...!
The car does a 540, rear-end first around to the right...I clip a mailbox made from a piece of telephone pole RIGHT behing the door, spin around another 360 degrees before the car stops...smack in the side road just around the corner. Proper lane, right at the stop sign. I'm covered in glass from my lost windows and staring out the window at a cow standing in the middle of the road.
Had I not fallen asleep, I'd have plowed into that cow and most assuredly died as it came through the window and crushed me.
I climbed out of the car, which was still running...and hugged the roof for about 5 minutes...then drove home.
So you want to know how I earned my screen name, Huh? Well it all started as a kid comming home from a party at the Drive-In in a Bud's Mustang. We stopped and picked up 3 girls walking up the hill. Then saw two guys with their car broke down. 7 people in a 67 coupe is tight so I climbed out to the roof and held on to the rain rails on corners. The driver couldn't hear me so I banged on the roof for another beer. One of the girls was screaming "He fell off, pull over!" Tommy told her to hand me a beer and I stayed on the roof til we dropped her at her house. After a while people were asking for the show. That was great until I (sacralige) spilled a beer on the floor and on the next venture out slipped on the door frame cracking my jewels on the door edge...then I fell off the side of the car and Tom ran over both my legs. Thank God we were in a corn field at the tme. I rolled over to see another friends Nova comming straight at me. I stood up and dove for the hood grabbing the wipers for support. He gladly turned them on and laughed. Great party that night. I guess it doesn't count as It didn't happen IN the car, but it inspired many a trip like it.
Another night Tom and I were following some girls to a party and I went up on the roof of his Regal. He thought it looked like fun and tried it too. We kept switching drivers until at one point we were both out of the car and began to argue about who was supposed to be driving. The Girls turned off their headlights in an effort to loose the two nutjobs they just met. They cut through the local McD's and went threw the yellow traffic light at the exit. Of course when we went threw it , it was red. The cop across the street pulled us over and had the nerve to ask Tom, "Is that the way you always leave McDonalds? Sideways?" Tom looked him straight in the face and as sure as I am breathing answered "Nope, sometimes I have food". Yup, he got the ticket.
Then there is the night I took my 72 Bug over a road we constantly jumped cars. I hit one of the hills at about 45 and got her airborn. On the landing the steering wheel was about a foot higher than on take off... of course that was because the driver's seat went right through the floor.
Speaking of airborn... I jumped my 84 Rx-7 one night and caught the attention of the local PD. The cop turned around to chase me and I took off toward town. I went across the school's ball field and up a grass hill, then around the back of the building. Rather than meet the cop on the other side of the school I cut up an old bike trail but there was a new fence installed so I backed up and parked in the gulley. My friend and I rolled out of the car and pulled up some of the tall grass. Because we were down below road grade the cop drove by and didn't see us. We had to call a friend to pull me out but didnt get a ticket.....
let me tell you of why you should never do as a 81 chevy does.....which probably caused my rear gear ordeal...
atlast i found a parking lot to freestyle in broad daylight. my best friend tiny and i were driving along and i show him my new playground. which was a best buy customercar audio install parking lot. we drew a crowd in my truck and his awesome 1988 mustang gt 5.0l. doing burnouts, rockfords and such. when amidst the smoke i pull a perfect donut which was as round as a basket ball and the end met perfect. boy was i proud. so tiny attempted the same thing, but we later found that8.8 rear ends of that year dont have coned axle bearings. and it blew out the center section
fast forward 2 years. we were heading to a truckstop for 3 am after beer grub when another buddy driving a 96 licoln wit a 4.6 decides he would really like to see what my truck has. well i easily took his 100$. then i was so happy when we got to our destination i was whipping Os again. he tried the same since his feelings werent hurt too bad until in the middle of the 3rd the car quit running. turns out oil pumps do go bad under severe stress. and then cranks snap. then you use a magnet to pick up your pistons and rods and other parts in 20 foot circle where you WERE having more fun than your car could handle.
lol....since then i allow my friends to have there fun first or both of our fun is ruined when something is on a wrecker
those are some of the funniest damn stories i've ever heard. i'm still laughing. i think i'll add to this by telling about some of the lessons i've learned.
1.most nissans can fly. but their hoods won't shut right after the landing
2.full size ford vans can make a 4wheeler trail bigger. but the mirrors take some damage
3.being in a car when it catches on fire can look like its over heating..... until the fuel line ruptures.... with pressure still in it
4.the distance from the bottom of the bumper on my nova to the ground is the exact same as the top of my knee to the bottom of my shoe as long as the tank is empty (i trashed that jack shortly thereafter)
5.if you accedently shift your bike into nuetral before a turn make sure you grab the clutch before attempting to find the right gear
6.never underestimate a toyota tacoma
7.rippled roads and a stiff rear suspesion equal not good under emergency braking....
8.....saturn s-series are not worth the chase
9.just because the tach says 9k rpm doesn't mean the engine likes that
The worst thing about my stories is that they are true....or at least that is the way I remember things happening.
My friend Tom and I used to get in trouble all the time. We once got a cop to drink gasoline because he didn't believe that there was gas in the qt Bud bottle. He took a swig before smelling the bottle. Tom offered him a cigarette.
Another time we had his sled on the trailer and a DEP officer came around the corner a little fast. He over corrected and stuffed his car into a snow bank. I didn't think you had to stop for flashing green lights??? Tom pulled over and the guy yelled at us for having the trailer on the wrong side of the road...we were stopped at a stop sign for God's sake. At one point Tom asked they guy to hurry up if he was gonna write a ticket. I quote "I've been taken in for DWI and got out on bail in the time its taking you to write this".
I got stopped for doing whole shots on Main street with the Miata ST. Patty's day 2 years ago. I took off on the cop and cut through a parking lot. The guy behind me called the PD and the cop was pissed when he caught up to me. He asked if I knew why I was being stopped and I told him "I bet you're gonna tell me" As he put it "When my Sargent gets a cell call from a guy telling him the car I'm cashing West, is really going North on another road, you are getting a ticket". He called for back up and that guy was an old school friend. He walked up and put his hands on the window sill, leaned in and said to Jim and I, "Are you two ever gonna grow up?" Jim spouted off "We're workin on it Todd, we're working on it". Again, Honesty got me a ticket but kept me fron a DWI.
So...I just got out of the service (second time) and I decide to ride home on my VF-1000 RR (Vance and Hines rework). I'm in upstate NY. It's January. 4-5 ft of snow on the ground. Ah, who cares, I'm a tough jarhead!
So...I take off. Decide to stick to the highways...which are 2 feet of slush. Temp: 34 degrees. I'm in my Bates one-piece, wearing a 'rainproof' oversuit, Apple-warmer on my neck...etc. I can only do maybe 35 MPH. Which sucks, because the big trucks are doing 50-55 MPH. Every time one goes by...slush bath. I can't remember when I lost consciousness nor how the bike and I remained upright for 5 miles...what woke me up was when I slid out of the fast lane (don't know how I got in the fast lane) and banked my head off the side of a tractor-trailer, who was, at this point, driving on the shoulder trying not to kill me and laying on the air horn the whole time...so I figured maybe I should pull over. That's all I did...think about it. I pressed on. My brain was so numb thinking was out of the question. Endeavor to perservere! Now I understand Chief Joseph!
So I get onto I-80 going West towards home. I remember lots of horns beeping...people yelling...still getting a slush bath mostly constantly until I get to the exit on I-80 with the walk-over between sides (some foreign-sounding name...Lebanon?). I manage to get the bike off the highway and pull around to the entrance. Get the kick-stand down, climb off the bike and start to stagger inside.
My joints are so frozen up I am walking all hunched/crouched over...trailing water that's leaking OUT of my leathers onto the floor and ice that's sloughing off me. Unbeknownst to me, the bike's still running. Some guy is nice enough to turn it off and take the key out. He, with his family and about 10 other people, are walking behind the frozen idiot as he stumbles along the walkover.
I make it to a pay phone...manage to punch in the numbers for my mom and dad...then pass out, still have my helmet/gloves, etc. on. There's a 5 foot wide puddle around me. I had made the call collect, had to say 'collect' four times before the operator could make out what I was saying...so when I hit the ground, the phone's just hanging there. The same guy got the key picks it up, and says "There's some kid here wearing motorcycle clothing." My dad accepts. Asks where I am. The guy tells him, my dad thanks him, then with 4 other guys, they pick me up and carry me to a booth at McDonalds, where I finish draining all over the floor.
My dad and uncle show up about 4 hours later. I'm sort of thawed out to where with help I could actually take my helmet and jacket off (no, nobody had taken my helmet off). Then I passed out again. Dad and uncle showed up, loaded the bike in the back of his 4-door 1972 Chevy step-side dualie (454 blown), peeled my leathers off, wrapped me in thermal blankets and threw me in the back and drove home. I warmed up after about 2.5 hours, woke up and sat up. My uncle said "Hey, he's up." Dad said... "Hold the wheel a second." Turned around and smacked me upside the head. He wasn't a big talker.
As soon as I got home, I climbed out of the truck, put on the clothes and what not my dad had brought along for me, rolled the bike down off the back of the truck and, since it was 55 degrees in Ohio...climbed on, fired that sucker up, hugged Dad, who smacked me again...dropped the sucker in gear and burned it all the way down the driveway to go see all my friends.
I flew a 1970 Torino Cobra 429 roughly 25 feet back at 110 MPH in the 1980's. I broke both A arm bushings, dented my front valance panel, oil pan and headers. I didn’t really think about the big block weighing the front end down in the air when I was airborne.
Just to spice this up for ladies I was naked when it I did this .....and I wasn't running from the cops. As any ladies man can tell you sometimes you have to make a quick getaway and you pants are the last thing you are thinking about. I'm really lucky I was able to grab the car keys off the bedroom dresser on the way out the window.
The Pic above was the next morning if you look at front wheels you can see the issue.
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Driver/Captain Eye Candy: Tony Intrieri ~~ Co-pilot:/NAVI-Supreme: Kenny Brown
Viper I'm sorry your mental capacity has been filled by an episode of Sponge bob square pants and your still trying to figure out where babies come from maybe you should stick to looney toons and let us handle crazy car stories and look short simple and to the point have a great day *TJ*
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Ok this is what had happened it was like this... and thats how it ended up i swear...... I drank too many monsters...now my pee is fizzy!
Your gonna need more than that little viper boy I'm curious a viper stock has I believe 500hp/500ftlbs of torque and you have 575 correct?? depending on if its a speciality I think you need to close down you night club/Shutdown mcdonalds and go hang out with some people around speed shops and learn something playing grid on xbox doesn't make you a hard a$$ I don't care how many races you won on there ok?
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Ok this is what had happened it was like this... and thats how it ended up i swear...... I drank too many monsters...now my pee is fizzy!
Sorry, I believe in details. I tell it the way it's in my brain. Being a journalist, I type, well, rather fast. And I'm with slave6. You can be an auto enthusiast and still read (3-4 books a week).
I recommend this for Demonik. That, and perhaps paying better attention in high school, which is where, I'm sure, you go during the day.
Look! Short and to the point! See, I can...oh, sorry. I'm outa here.
You know what?? here's short and to the point off is the general direction I wish for you to F$ck ok I'm outta school outta college and in the shops doing sh!t you only read about so you go ahead and pay for your rides to be fast I'll build mine and enjoy the satisfaction of victory and know it was by my own hands i do my trash talking on the track this all started due to some pussy @$$ who thinks a factory pos is a hot rod ok be origional dude your opinions don't make a damn bit of difference to me go play with youselves in the corner
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Ok this is what had happened it was like this... and thats how it ended up i swear...... I drank too many monsters...now my pee is fizzy!
Is your plan to creat a lot of drama on the forum between the two of you to improve your chances of being selected for Seaon 3 so that America can see the drama on TV? If so I think your plan might work.
Hey Dime, as for my I am all about making my point. as for Mustang he is just an dumbass and talks out of his ass.
You know what?? here's short and to the point off is the general direction I wish for you to F$ck ok I'm outta school outta college and in the shops doing sh!t you only read about so you go ahead and pay for your rides to be fast I'll build mine and enjoy the satisfaction of victory and know it was by my own hands i do my trash talking on the track this all started due to some pussy @$$ who thinks a factory pos is a hot rod ok be origional dude your opinions don't make a damn bit of difference to me go play with youselves in the corner
I would say grade 9 maybe 10??? This guy is working at Mr Lube as a helper!!!(part time) and School the rest of the time...
ding ding ding!!!! your lunch is over back to P.E.
There does tend to be a little angst between those that see themselves are car builders vs. those that they see as car buyers (ie, those that buy sporty cars that don't know @#!$! about cars). Being a "builder" I can understand where Demonik is coming from (because you have a fancy/pricy Viper) but he is coming across like a absolute idiot, why you're more composed & have come back with some really entertaining zingers.
Thanks man!!! as for builder and buyers I dont know how people are thinking that just because I have a Viper I am a buyer??? yes I bought a Viper but I build car all the time, My next project is a K car that is in the 9s, a sleeper. but that is what I call penis envy on Demoniks part... oh well what can I do, he did up a Mustang everybody and there dogs have a done up mustang in there back yards it is boring!!!! maybe he should buy the dime and at least be original!!!
It wouldn't be so bad if he could put out one coherent sentence instead of that stilted, Forrest Gump stumbling...no, wait, that's an insult to Forrest...he's more lucid in the way he speaks. I can see the spittle flying all over the monitor while he's typing and swearing at the screen. He probably doesn't notice the mess, however, since the keyboard is probably covered in who-knows-what from his visiting the NAMBLA web site.
It still amazes me that, sitting in front of a device that allows you to GO BACK, CORRECT AND EVEN HELP YOU SPELL CORRECTLY...people can think they're saying something other people will be able to understand. If this is an indication of his attention to detail, I wouldn't want him building anything for me...who knows what will fall into the block? ...what bolts won't go torqued...and with the spooge on his hands from staring at nubile little boys...would you want to touch the steering wheel after he was finished?
Not I.
Stupid is as stupid does. Thanks for proving that out De'. And we wonder why we're at the bottom of the barrel when it comes to professionals...?
haha I like that, you hit the nail on the head. my thought is he is so use to typing with 1 hand from all the porn sites that he cant make sence when he types. the only thing he can type is (Google and gay porn)
I'm staying out of this one! haha
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you mean besides evading various State Troopers to keep my insurance costs down while I was under 25?
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Pretty sure Musto could whup Team Viper in the I-4 Ford Fusion he used last year . . . http://blog.cardomain.com/blog/2008/07/bullrun-2008--3.html
"There were no cops, no trees, no humans of any kind so we decided to wring out the little Ford. For 47 minutes straight the Fusion was pinned at 111 mph with the A/C on getting 25mpg. John, Gabe and I all sat there astonished. We made one fuel stop, saw no other Bullrunners and came in... are you ready... 6th place for the day! IN A RENTED FORD FUSION!! CAN I GET A BOOYA!!!
Ford people, if you are reading this contact me immediately because I don't think you know how good this little car is. Seriously, we should talk about perhaps producing some Ford Fusion "MR. ANGRY" editions. I LOVE THIS CAR!"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XC7Xwzu878
http://www.cardomain.com/ride/2589291
We're all car guys (and girls!) here, so I'm pretty sure that at one point or another we've run from a cop. lol... I think we should leave out the running from the cop stories unless you made the news. Then we demand YouTube clips! hahahaha
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well in the summer me and my car club im in do some street racing out in the country late at night. we have like 50 cars park at this empty house with a field in the back. and people just take turns racing down the street in the front. there is a quarter mile marked and everything. last year i got to run agains a 5.0 mustang in my 71 trans am. just as we got done, and got to our turn around point cops were busting everyone in that field, but me and that 5.0 were already outta there. it was great.
and then of course on my new audition video everyone can see me hit a wall hard at our local oval race track in a 1986 trans am i bought for 500 bucks just to race out there. ill tell you that wall came at me quick and it hurt !
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Audition Video :
http://videos.streetfire.net/video/Team-Pontiac-Audition_697987.htm
myspace profile : www.myspace.com/gtaracing
car domain profile : http://www.cardomain.com/ride/2594229
"Workin Hard...Playin Even Harder"
I'm an aangel. I don't do things wrong :)
no comment at this time.
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"speed, mods, cars in general.. is like crack. and then it becomes my crack is better than your crack. Why can;t we just enjoy the crack together? Just enjoy the crack man"
[Quote TeamPontiac] *****************************************************************************
and then of course on my new audition video everyone can see me hit a wall hard at our local oval race track in a 1986 trans am i bought for 500 bucks just to race out there. ill tell you that wall came at me quick and it hurt !
[End Quote] *********************************************************************************Yeah, and they don't give much either....
Me and a buddy took two Yugo's to the track once. We sat there challenging everybody to a race for pink slips haha... I think that was pretty crazy. You shoulda seen the looks on people's faces.
Not really crazy, but someone got it in a picture.... Twizler pass at 100.
We were driving in a group 3 wide and about 4 or 5 deep. That was pretty fun.
Sex at 100mph
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hahahahahaV6hahahamustanghahahaha
Bring it on!
Was that solo... or with a partner?
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Get laid today in our TeamStrange Shwag! available at: http://www.teamstrangerocks.com
lmao
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Audition Video :
http://videos.streetfire.net/video/Team-Pontiac-Audition_697987.htm
myspace profile : www.myspace.com/gtaracing
car domain profile : http://www.cardomain.com/ride/2594229
"Workin Hard...Playin Even Harder"
Put the seat all the way back, and put the steering wheel level so she doesn't bruise her back. VERY IMPORTANT!! She has to be a little shorter than you so that you can see over her shoulder!!
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Pick a car Willow...any car!
Been almost an hour. Does this mean I win?
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Pick a car Willow...any car!
Really this one might be kinda lame but fighting a pissed off hornet in your car at 115 mph yea crap gets real intersting when that happens lol
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http://www.cardomain.com/ride/3136410
the Luminas build
[Quote Importfighter Z34]
Really this one might be kinda lame but fighting a pissed off hornet in your car at 115 mph yea crap gets real intersting when that happens lol
Try it on a motorcycle and one gets into your full faced helmet...
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Because nothing is faster than a SPEEDING BULLITT!
http://www.teambullitt.com
try scubadiving at 100', but make it tropical Canada has cold water. haha
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hahahahahaV6hahahamustanghahahaha
Bring it on!
Well since i drive a truck and have LOTS of room in the front seat ill let you all imagine what can be done while driving. And as far as cop problems i dont have them because most of the cops dont think of 8000lb diesel trucks as FAST little do them know. Oh and im also a firefighter.
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http://www.cardomain.com/ride/3219605
http://www.hubgarage.com/mygarage/neilden
www.youtube.com/neilden
sweet
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hahahahahaV6hahahamustanghahahaha
Bring it on!
When the statue of limitations expires I will let you know
i did end up on the news there was a accident on I-70 and a reporter on scene is reporting and you here about 6 cars racing down scarborough boulevard next to the highway brought the attention of the roporter off the 8 car pile up at brice rd and I-70 i was sixteen and got a phone call from mom watching the six o'clock news. the worst times are not paying the 100 dollar ticket but having your ass in a sling and your iroc sold based on the local news. hell i bought the car parents made me sell it and buy a 4door nova... and man do i miss that nova!!!! or the 400sb that fooled the crap out of mom
Okay then:
California 1977. I'm busting down I-5 just coming out of El Toro in my '76 Chevy Sport Bed step-side, lowered, 350/450 WHP, Cragars and Mickey's singing, doing about 80 MPH...taking it easy. Now, these are the hey-days of CB radios. My truck is LOADED with electronics...CB...kickers...filters...directionals, you name it, I have it.
When all of a sudden the radio comes to life. "Breaker 19, Breaker, looking for a Smokey report coming out of Fresno, 3 fast-movers need a recon'." "Hey Breaker, you got the Baby Blue Marine here (ya, I know)." I respond. "You're clear down to the San Juan exit. I haven't seen a thing." "Copy that 'Marine." he says. "Best move over." he finished. So, I keep on at my 80 MPH when what to my wondering eyes should appear...
...a dark spot against the shimmering tarmac behind me at about a half...no...quarter...no...HOLY SH_T! This was the first time I saw the LP400 Countach...for the nanosecond I did see it. Right behind it was, what I was to find out later...a Ferrari Dino 308 GT4. And pulling fast on the outside was, again, something I didn't know until later; a Ferrarri 512 BB. He had to be doing close to 160 MPH.
"Fast movers," I said. "You're coming past me!" "Thanks!" One of them yelled back on the CB and then they were GONE. Not gone, however, was the CHIPS that had been sitting on the overpass. He was coming like gangbusters down the entrance ramp!
"Break to fast movers!" I yelled. "Smokey on the ramp, coming hard!" "10-4 'Marine, not to worry...we're gone!" he said. And they were. And the Patrolman knew it. So, he went for the next best thing...the guy that had been running their 'front door' and who he'd been listening to. I'd slowed to 5 over...so as not to look too suspiscious. To no avail. He lit me up. I pulled over. He got out of his vehicle and walked up, looking all pissed off.
He chewed me out for '...aiding and abetting...' dangerous motorists, then strolled around my truck checking it out. He looked under the fenders into the wheel wells and asked me to pop the hood. "What's that?" he asked. "Blower." says I. I get back in my truck. He writes me a ticket for...dropping refuse on the highway. He said a McDonald's bag flew out of my bed. I turned around, he smirked...while I stared at my custom all-leather from Tijuana tonneau cover, tightly snapped down. Plus, real men don't eat at McD's...so, no chance.
I took the ticket. Then 50 miles down the road in a rest stop, flagging me down, were the three criminals. I stopped and we talked cars for a good hour and they got a good laugh out of my getting a ticket...then, pulled out their wallets and came up with the fine.
Never saw them again.
So, I'm in Dunnelon, FL, during my 'dark days' in 1980. Just got done DJing at the club in Crystal River...it was late, around 4 am 'cause we'd been hanging out in the parking lot, me, Jack the Bouncer and Karen, my g/f. I hop into my 1978 Monza (man I wish I still had THAT car) and take off. I'm dead tired...zipping through the back roads of Dunnelon county headed home...when I come upon Dead Man's Curve...doing about 80 MPH...and asleep.
The right front wheel dropped off the tarmac, jolting me awake. I'm pretty sure I screamed like a girl, wrestling the wheel and stomping the brake pedal clear through the fire wall...!
The car does a 540, rear-end first around to the right...I clip a mailbox made from a piece of telephone pole RIGHT behing the door, spin around another 360 degrees before the car stops...smack in the side road just around the corner. Proper lane, right at the stop sign. I'm covered in glass from my lost windows and staring out the window at a cow standing in the middle of the road.
Had I not fallen asleep, I'd have plowed into that cow and most assuredly died as it came through the window and crushed me.
I climbed out of the car, which was still running...and hugged the roof for about 5 minutes...then drove home.
So you want to know how I earned my screen name, Huh? Well it all started as a kid comming home from a party at the Drive-In in a Bud's Mustang. We stopped and picked up 3 girls walking up the hill. Then saw two guys with their car broke down. 7 people in a 67 coupe is tight so I climbed out to the roof and held on to the rain rails on corners. The driver couldn't hear me so I banged on the roof for another beer. One of the girls was screaming "He fell off, pull over!" Tommy told her to hand me a beer and I stayed on the roof til we dropped her at her house. After a while people were asking for the show. That was great until I (sacralige) spilled a beer on the floor and on the next venture out slipped on the door frame cracking my jewels on the door edge...then I fell off the side of the car and Tom ran over both my legs. Thank God we were in a corn field at the tme. I rolled over to see another friends Nova comming straight at me. I stood up and dove for the hood grabbing the wipers for support. He gladly turned them on and laughed. Great party that night. I guess it doesn't count as It didn't happen IN the car, but it inspired many a trip like it.
Another night Tom and I were following some girls to a party and I went up on the roof of his Regal. He thought it looked like fun and tried it too. We kept switching drivers until at one point we were both out of the car and began to argue about who was supposed to be driving. The Girls turned off their headlights in an effort to loose the two nutjobs they just met. They cut through the local McD's and went threw the yellow traffic light at the exit. Of course when we went threw it , it was red. The cop across the street pulled us over and had the nerve to ask Tom, "Is that the way you always leave McDonalds? Sideways?" Tom looked him straight in the face and as sure as I am breathing answered "Nope, sometimes I have food". Yup, he got the ticket.
Then there is the night I took my 72 Bug over a road we constantly jumped cars. I hit one of the hills at about 45 and got her airborn. On the landing the steering wheel was about a foot higher than on take off... of course that was because the driver's seat went right through the floor.
Speaking of airborn... I jumped my 84 Rx-7 one night and caught the attention of the local PD. The cop turned around to chase me and I took off toward town. I went across the school's ball field and up a grass hill, then around the back of the building. Rather than meet the cop on the other side of the school I cut up an old bike trail but there was a new fence installed so I backed up and parked in the gulley. My friend and I rolled out of the car and pulled up some of the tall grass. Because we were down below road grade the cop drove by and didn't see us. We had to call a friend to pull me out but didnt get a ticket.....
Theres more, but I dont want to bore you all.....
Chris
let me tell you of why you should never do as a 81 chevy does.....which probably caused my rear gear ordeal...
atlast i found a parking lot to freestyle in broad daylight. my best friend tiny and i were driving along and i show him my new playground. which was a best buy customercar audio install parking lot. we drew a crowd in my truck and his awesome 1988 mustang gt 5.0l. doing burnouts, rockfords and such. when amidst the smoke i pull a perfect donut which was as round as a basket ball and the end met perfect. boy was i proud. so tiny attempted the same thing, but we later found that8.8 rear ends of that year dont have coned axle bearings. and it blew out the center section
fast forward 2 years. we were heading to a truckstop for 3 am after beer grub when another buddy driving a 96 licoln wit a 4.6 decides he would really like to see what my truck has. well i easily took his 100$. then i was so happy when we got to our destination i was whipping Os again. he tried the same since his feelings werent hurt too bad until in the middle of the 3rd the car quit running. turns out oil pumps do go bad under severe stress. and then cranks snap. then you use a magnet to pick up your pistons and rods and other parts in 20 foot circle where you WERE having more fun than your car could handle.
lol....since then i allow my friends to have there fun first or both of our fun is ruined when something is on a wrecker
those are some of the funniest damn stories i've ever heard. i'm still laughing. i think i'll add to this by telling about some of the lessons i've learned.
1.most nissans can fly. but their hoods won't shut right after the landing
2.full size ford vans can make a 4wheeler trail bigger. but the mirrors take some damage
3.being in a car when it catches on fire can look like its over heating..... until the fuel line ruptures.... with pressure still in it
4.the distance from the bottom of the bumper on my nova to the ground is the exact same as the top of my knee to the bottom of my shoe as long as the tank is empty (i trashed that jack shortly thereafter)
5.if you accedently shift your bike into nuetral before a turn make sure you grab the clutch before attempting to find the right gear
6.never underestimate a toyota tacoma
7.rippled roads and a stiff rear suspesion equal not good under emergency braking....
8.....saturn s-series are not worth the chase
9.just because the tach says 9k rpm doesn't mean the engine likes that
10.a friendly race can break out at any second
The worst thing about my stories is that they are true....or at least that is the way I remember things happening.
My friend Tom and I used to get in trouble all the time. We once got a cop to drink gasoline because he didn't believe that there was gas in the qt Bud bottle. He took a swig before smelling the bottle. Tom offered him a cigarette.
Another time we had his sled on the trailer and a DEP officer came around the corner a little fast. He over corrected and stuffed his car into a snow bank. I didn't think you had to stop for flashing green lights??? Tom pulled over and the guy yelled at us for having the trailer on the wrong side of the road...we were stopped at a stop sign for God's sake. At one point Tom asked they guy to hurry up if he was gonna write a ticket. I quote "I've been taken in for DWI and got out on bail in the time its taking you to write this".
I got stopped for doing whole shots on Main street with the Miata ST. Patty's day 2 years ago. I took off on the cop and cut through a parking lot. The guy behind me called the PD and the cop was pissed when he caught up to me. He asked if I knew why I was being stopped and I told him "I bet you're gonna tell me" As he put it "When my Sargent gets a cell call from a guy telling him the car I'm cashing West, is really going North on another road, you are getting a ticket". He called for back up and that guy was an old school friend. He walked up and put his hands on the window sill, leaned in and said to Jim and I, "Are you two ever gonna grow up?" Jim spouted off "We're workin on it Todd, we're working on it". Again, Honesty got me a ticket but kept me fron a DWI.
Holy crap do the new guys write alot! haha
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[Quote Team Viper]
Holy crap do the new guys write alot! haha
LMFAO!
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no
So...I just got out of the service (second time) and I decide to ride home on my VF-1000 RR (Vance and Hines rework). I'm in upstate NY. It's January. 4-5 ft of snow on the ground. Ah, who cares, I'm a tough jarhead!
So...I take off. Decide to stick to the highways...which are 2 feet of slush. Temp: 34 degrees. I'm in my Bates one-piece, wearing a 'rainproof' oversuit, Apple-warmer on my neck...etc. I can only do maybe 35 MPH. Which sucks, because the big trucks are doing 50-55 MPH. Every time one goes by...slush bath. I can't remember when I lost consciousness nor how the bike and I remained upright for 5 miles...what woke me up was when I slid out of the fast lane (don't know how I got in the fast lane) and banked my head off the side of a tractor-trailer, who was, at this point, driving on the shoulder trying not to kill me and laying on the air horn the whole time...so I figured maybe I should pull over. That's all I did...think about it. I pressed on. My brain was so numb thinking was out of the question. Endeavor to perservere! Now I understand Chief Joseph!
So I get onto I-80 going West towards home. I remember lots of horns beeping...people yelling...still getting a slush bath mostly constantly until I get to the exit on I-80 with the walk-over between sides (some foreign-sounding name...Lebanon?). I manage to get the bike off the highway and pull around to the entrance. Get the kick-stand down, climb off the bike and start to stagger inside.
My joints are so frozen up I am walking all hunched/crouched over...trailing water that's leaking OUT of my leathers onto the floor and ice that's sloughing off me. Unbeknownst to me, the bike's still running. Some guy is nice enough to turn it off and take the key out. He, with his family and about 10 other people, are walking behind the frozen idiot as he stumbles along the walkover.
I make it to a pay phone...manage to punch in the numbers for my mom and dad...then pass out, still have my helmet/gloves, etc. on. There's a 5 foot wide puddle around me. I had made the call collect, had to say 'collect' four times before the operator could make out what I was saying...so when I hit the ground, the phone's just hanging there. The same guy got the key picks it up, and says "There's some kid here wearing motorcycle clothing." My dad accepts. Asks where I am. The guy tells him, my dad thanks him, then with 4 other guys, they pick me up and carry me to a booth at McDonalds, where I finish draining all over the floor.
My dad and uncle show up about 4 hours later. I'm sort of thawed out to where with help I could actually take my helmet and jacket off (no, nobody had taken my helmet off). Then I passed out again. Dad and uncle showed up, loaded the bike in the back of his 4-door 1972 Chevy step-side dualie (454 blown), peeled my leathers off, wrapped me in thermal blankets and threw me in the back and drove home. I warmed up after about 2.5 hours, woke up and sat up. My uncle said "Hey, he's up." Dad said... "Hold the wheel a second." Turned around and smacked me upside the head. He wasn't a big talker.
As soon as I got home, I climbed out of the truck, put on the clothes and what not my dad had brought along for me, rolled the bike down off the back of the truck and, since it was 55 degrees in Ohio...climbed on, fired that sucker up, hugged Dad, who smacked me again...dropped the sucker in gear and burned it all the way down the driveway to go see all my friends.
Danm you should clear the smoke off you keyboard!!!! It would take me a week to read that.
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no chit
I flew a 1970 Torino Cobra 429 roughly 25 feet back at 110 MPH in the 1980's. I broke both A arm bushings, dented my front valance panel, oil pan and headers. I didn’t really think about the big block weighing the front end down in the air when I was airborne.
Just to spice this up for ladies I was naked when it I did this .....and I wasn't running from the cops. As any ladies man can tell you sometimes you have to make a quick getaway and you pants are the last thing you are thinking about. I'm really lucky I was able to grab the car keys off the bedroom dresser on the way out the window.
The Pic above was the next morning if you look at front wheels you can see the issue.
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Viper I'm sorry your mental capacity has been filled by an episode of Sponge bob square pants and your still trying to figure out where babies come from maybe you should stick to looney toons and let us handle crazy car stories and look short simple and to the point have a great day *TJ*
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Ok this is what had happened it was like this... and thats how it ended up i swear...... I drank too many monsters...now my pee is fizzy!
haha a new KC!!! (Ford guy) is yours a 6 to?
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Nope 4.6 for your a$$ boy bring it better ask mommy and daddy 1st to see if you can play outside
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Ok this is what had happened it was like this... and thats how it ended up i swear...... I drank too many monsters...now my pee is fizzy!
haha when your nuts drop you can come play with the big dogs! haha
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welli really think he would like to play with the big dogs... but for some reason the "BIG DOG is hiding under the porch
Your gonna need more than that little viper boy I'm curious a viper stock has I believe 500hp/500ftlbs of torque and you have 575 correct?? depending on if its a speciality I think you need to close down you night club/Shutdown mcdonalds and go hang out with some people around speed shops and learn something playing grid on xbox doesn't make you a hard a$$ I don't care how many races you won on there ok?
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Ok this is what had happened it was like this... and thats how it ended up i swear...... I drank too many monsters...now my pee is fizzy!
Loser!!! I could bytch slap you with my Neon... wouldnt bring the Viper out for a Mustang(not worth the gas)
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Oooh I'm real scared now hahahaha
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Ok this is what had happened it was like this... and thats how it ended up i swear...... I drank too many monsters...now my pee is fizzy!
[Quote Team Viper]
Danm you should clear the smoke off you keyboard!!!! It would take me a week to read that.
Not really our fault you’re a slow reader now is it?
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Sorry, I believe in details. I tell it the way it's in my brain. Being a journalist, I type, well, rather fast. And I'm with slave6. You can be an auto enthusiast and still read (3-4 books a week).
I recommend this for Demonik. That, and perhaps paying better attention in high school, which is where, I'm sure, you go during the day.
Look! Short and to the point! See, I can...oh, sorry. I'm outa here.
You know what?? here's short and to the point off is the general direction I wish for you to F$ck ok I'm outta school outta college and in the shops doing sh!t you only read about so you go ahead and pay for your rides to be fast I'll build mine and enjoy the satisfaction of victory and know it was by my own hands i do my trash talking on the track this all started due to some pussy @$$ who thinks a factory pos is a hot rod ok be origional dude your opinions don't make a damn bit of difference to me go play with youselves in the corner
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Ok this is what had happened it was like this... and thats how it ended up i swear...... I drank too many monsters...now my pee is fizzy!
Demonik & Viper.
Is your plan to creat a lot of drama on the forum between the two of you to improve your chances of being selected for Seaon 3 so that America can see the drama on TV? If so I think your plan might work.
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The VQ swapped Dime is still a threat
Hey Dime, as for my I am all about making my point. as for Mustang he is just an dumbass and talks out of his ass.
You know what?? here's short and to the point off is the general direction I wish for you to F$ck ok I'm outta school outta college and in the shops doing sh!t you only read about so you go ahead and pay for your rides to be fast I'll build mine and enjoy the satisfaction of victory and know it was by my own hands i do my trash talking on the track this all started due to some pussy @$$ who thinks a factory pos is a hot rod ok be origional dude your opinions don't make a damn bit of difference to me go play with youselves in the corner
I would say grade 9 maybe 10??? This guy is working at Mr Lube as a helper!!!(part time) and School the rest of the time...
ding ding ding!!!! your lunch is over back to P.E.
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Yeah, I can see that.
There does tend to be a little angst between those that see themselves are car builders vs. those that they see as car buyers (ie, those that buy sporty cars that don't know @#!$! about cars). Being a "builder" I can understand where Demonik is coming from (because you have a fancy/pricy Viper) but he is coming across like a absolute idiot, why you're more composed & have come back with some really entertaining zingers.
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The VQ swapped Dime is still a threat
Thanks man!!! as for builder and buyers I dont know how people are thinking that just because I have a Viper I am a buyer??? yes I bought a Viper but I build car all the time, My next project is a K car that is in the 9s, a sleeper. but that is what I call penis envy on Demoniks part... oh well what can I do, he did up a Mustang everybody and there dogs have a done up mustang in there back yards it is boring!!!! maybe he should buy the dime and at least be original!!!
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It wouldn't be so bad if he could put out one coherent sentence instead of that stilted, Forrest Gump stumbling...no, wait, that's an insult to Forrest...he's more lucid in the way he speaks. I can see the spittle flying all over the monitor while he's typing and swearing at the screen. He probably doesn't notice the mess, however, since the keyboard is probably covered in who-knows-what from his visiting the NAMBLA web site.
It still amazes me that, sitting in front of a device that allows you to GO BACK, CORRECT AND EVEN HELP YOU SPELL CORRECTLY...people can think they're saying something other people will be able to understand. If this is an indication of his attention to detail, I wouldn't want him building anything for me...who knows what will fall into the block? ...what bolts won't go torqued...and with the spooge on his hands from staring at nubile little boys...would you want to touch the steering wheel after he was finished?
Not I.
Stupid is as stupid does. Thanks for proving that out De'. And we wonder why we're at the bottom of the barrel when it comes to professionals...?
haha I like that, you hit the nail on the head. my thought is he is so use to typing with 1 hand from all the porn sites that he cant make sence when he types. the only thing he can type is (Google and gay porn)
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